Thanks for your message. During our therapy sessions, I just wanted to begin an honest dialog. But we hadn't been doing that for most of our marriage, so I think in many ways it was far too late. The patterns were too hard to break. I think too that it's hard to talk about your flaws and what you could have done better in front of someone you are just getting to know--like a therapist. I'd been in therapy for 6 months already and was more comfortable with the process and knowing the goal is to help you become more self-aware and give you the tools to do the work. I was already beginning to see and work on what I could have done better. And maybe too, I leaned too heavily on wanting him to see how he wronged me instead of 'where do we go from here?'